My 2014 Christmas Greeting: #annushorribiluswithafewoutstandinghighlights,The House isn’t full

Those who meddled.

Those I had no choice but to let go.

Those who didn’t step up to the plate.

The vast audience of spectactors.

Those who interfered.

Those who spoke over me.

Those who spoke INSTEAD of me.

Those who treated my love life as if it was their own.

Those people who fucked with me.

Those people who fucked up with me denying solutions that were denied.

Those who stopped me thinking straight.

If the Campaign is guilty of #disabilism and#pity shame on you. If THIS is behind #annushorribilis shame on you. You should know better as forensic lawyers.

Those who fail to see the person.

Those who mishandle me.

Those who misunderstand me.

THE HOUSE IS NOT FULL.

My Christmas Tree which I meant to put up on Christmas Eve***ended up not up.

I couldn’t face Christmas for love or money.  Christmas was a Non Starter and I am a  Christmas Fan.

THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL.

Friends who failed to step up to the plate, who had the legal background to stick up for me and do a kate under incredibly difficult circumstances. You could have made much headway were you not a liar and deciever to steal my secrets.

I am usually a Material Girl but all attention to material longings dissapated in sea of longing for THE MISSING PEOPLE, THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL.

So many names, so many people.

So much suffering. in all this Year I am too vulnerable, too weak, too challenged in a two horse race where alledgely the strongest survive.

THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL.

Forced into suffering, coerced into a weak place, denied REAL SOLUTIONS.

THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL.

The miracle was that I had any semblance of a Christmas., helped along by Carols about Angels (you mean I have to think of these creatures having ANYTHING to do with my life!!!), the IMPOSSIBLE.

My family put me up in a  Barbican Hotel with shit WIFI. I couldnt be online for love or money.  The Apartment was perfect,  self contained flat with all mod cons with a MASSIVE DOUBLE BED dominating the room. Ironing board, hot showers, hot shower baths, hairwash bodywash, a small cooker,  a fridge, a dishwasher!!, a giant screen TV with foreign language channels !!!(Spanish, French, German)  a wardrobe. I wanted for nothing bar WIFI THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL.

My brother in law made a magnificent  feast a typical  Family affair. Turkey, ham, roast potatoes, roast parnsips, roast carrots, stuffing,  bread sauce. unfortunately we were under supplied on gravy.  Pigs in blankets’#christmasfeast. Pudding was a delicious  Christmas Pudding served with the best Champagne I ever tasted, served with double cream, brandy butter. Other pud options included Buche de Noel, Pannatone, plus Cheese and biscuits of the classiest kind. THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL, MISSING PEOPLE, MISSING CIRCUMSTANCES, MISSING THINKING that could have made the worst year of my life at least have some pleasures?

My stepmum paid my fare back to HOME TOWN. so no financial expense beyond the minimum.

The Barbican a veritable gym for my #specialsport (you footballers would approve!)

The presents i got can only be described as sexy. #sexypresents just fitting my mood in a year when my real needs got ignored, when I was in so much stress solutions could not be found.#takebackthenight

It is horrible to be in a house where there are so many absent friends, none existent hedonistic constructive solutions,  even worse when Members of that house obstruct answers helpfulness etc it is unforgivable.

My Angels Playlist was the only Christmas Music I could endure. Imagine those Angels! I am unworthy! Go away from me!

Christmas Angels helped me to enjoy the non stop Carols soundtrack playing as we ate our meal. It got to be that I played Christmas music on  the radio but it was NOT

Slades ‘So here it is Merry Christmas’  a song that has been played every year bar this one.

THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL. MEDDLING, INTERFERING, SPEAKING OVER ME, INSTEAD OF ME. The future had NOT just begun.  My Christmas died when you meddled in my affairs, stuck your nose in where it is was and is not wanted, fucking me over.

No words of mine can do justice to how much I didn’t want to celebrate Christmas.

only and impossible miracle NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD got me remotely in the Christmas spirit BECAUSE THE HOUSE WAS NOT FULL.

The people who matter besides my Family.#likeghosts #likespectreswhodepart

#beyondpain

#thehousewasnotfull #thehouseisnotfull

This is my Christmas Greeting. I wish it could have been different but the above meant a cancelled Christmas saved only by the Impossible?

 

 

 

 

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